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Juju's Canadian Guarantee!

What's with the Maple Leaf? (Eh?)

Juju's a Canuck. A Canuck with scales.  One day he needed a new air-powered scuba diver ornament for his bowl. So he went surfing. As a Canuck, he went looking for Canadian online stores. Didn't find much at first. Hmmm, how about non-Canadian sites? Not much help either and much more confusing. Whoever came up with the term "Global Village" must have been American.

Very few sites were "Canadian-Friendly". Juju was very disappointed to find that most offers, contests, and even online retailers on the "World Wide" web are US-centric (Juju grew up in an jar, so you can't blame his surprise).  Fine print such as "Must be a resident of USA", or "International shipping is $35+$10 per item" made Juju long for a technology that would allow him to reach through the screen and poke those pesky Americans with his Big Fin.

While Juju was swimming in circles for the 17th straight day, he realized that there was a need out there. Fellow Canucks needed help navigating the maze and mess of unavailability's and restrictions. He realized Canucks needed some quasi-custom-made guidance (whatever that is) and retreated to a hidden bowl up in the mountains. After 17 days and nights, he returned somber and silent. When the mass of his rejoicing followers settled down, he stood up high on his little tail and pronounced in the loudest booming fish-voice he could muster with his 67ml lung capacity,  "I... AM... CANADIAN!"

Juju then pulled out 2 large (relatively speaking, of course) tablets. One had some nonsensical new age poetry etched on it's surface (no one can figure out how he was able to hold on to a chisel and hammer with his fins), and on the other was inscribed the 1 Commandment:



 All products/services/offers will be available to Canadians, and at a reasonable cost*.

 * By "reasonable cost" we assume Juju means "un-ludicrous", but we can't be sure. 

How did this cryptic phrase apply to the normal fish? No one was quite sure at the time, but Juju was hatching a sneaky little plan (apparently that's what the poetry really was) to build a website for Canucks based on his 1 Commandment. That poetry became GoldfishLegs.com.

We here at GoldfishLegs.com (it's just me and Juju actually), follow this commandment and this commandment only. It's our creed, motto, slogan, mantra and favourite quote. And here's another one:

"It's time Canucks got some respect."

FAQ

Huh?
Juju The Fish
Maple Leaf?
FAQ?

The first time Juju ordered my air-powered scuba diver from the comfort of his own bowl, Juju knew he was on to something big. Juju envisioned goldfish everywhere ordering aquarium accessories in their underwear on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

-Juju alluding to his belief that the explosive popularity of e-commerce was all his doing.

 

Please forward all comments, suggestions, & edible flake donations to Juju  the Bowlmaster
© 1999-2001 GoldfishLegs.com - All Wrongs Reversed & Trades Marked (because Fish have lawyers too!)
PAGE UPDATED: November 30, 2002